I have something to say about having something to say

Everyone has something to say. They just have to know how to listen.

I’ve always been told I’m a “good listener.” I listen, I pay attention, and I do my best to genuinely understand what someone is trying to communicate, but the one person I’ve never been any good at listening to is myself.

I am a composer on the side and when it comes to music, I’ve always had a voice. I’ve always had something to contribute. But I was always confused by other musicians that were able to write lyrics and sing. They were able to take something from their life that they felt that was worth saying and were able to put it into words to share with the world. This was a completely foreign concept to me.

I’ve recently come to realize that I could never write a song because I listened to what everyone else had to say so much that I started mistaking others’ thoughts as my own and, therefore, never felt as if I had anything that was unique or worth saying.

For the last year or so, I’ve been on a crazy journey of self-discovery and for the first time in my life, I am starting to hear my own voice. It started out very quietly and was still easily drowned out by everyone else, so I took three basic steps to quiet the voices around me and put myself in an environment that I could hear myself.

Information diet: 
I cut out as much noise as I could. I cut back on all social media and any other sources of other people’s thoughts and opinions on things.

Doing things alone: 
I realized that if I don’t do things with other people, I can’t be influenced by their opinions of whatever I just did. So, I started going to movies and local theater productions on my own.

Stop telling people my plans: 
My friends can’t have an opinion on something they don’t know about. This one had a bonus of boosting my self-confidence because I only shared my plans after I had completed them, so I only shared my successes.

My voice is still somewhat quiet, but it’s growing louder and I can finally listen to and understand what I have to say.